Monday, April 23, 2012
Raising The White Flag!
I've been hearing this song a lot lately... Yet another one of those things that has happened and I have received a check in my spirit knowing that it is by no accident. God is so perfect... So on time. I realize that sometimes it appears that we are one big yo-yo family. We decide this, and then we decide that. That's the problem though... WE decide. It should never be that way. Surrender should be something that comes naturally, don't you think? It isn't though... And that is why we lift this white flag when "the war" is over. For some reason, our natural instinct is to fight the war first. We give it everything we have. We have absolutely NO peace, and we continue the battle until we feel that there is justice. Justice comes in the act of surrender though. Last week, through many different circumstances, we raised our flag. I cannot tell you what life has been like since. All I can say is that there has been TOTAL surrender, and in that, justice has come. We will only move from this place if we are made to before the end of our two year wait to buy another home. We actually had a rental application filled out last week for another home. We were within minutes of handing over the application for this house that would have all new everything! All new carpet, paint, fixtures, appliances... EVERYTHING! It was a bigger home that would come at a bigger price. Somehow, we had almost convinced ourselves that we NEEDED it, that we DESERVED it. Truthfully, nothing could be further from the truth. Our needs are being met right where we are at, and WE are not the ones to say what WE deserve! The Lord should always be the one to gift us, not ourselves. I remember many years ago Jason and I had been through the loss of our first two sons. We had then met up with difficulties conceiving. We tried everything.... Including medications. After over a year of this, we decided to lift our flag of surrender. Neither of us had been baptized. We decided to be baptized together as an act of re-committing our lives to Christ and surrendering our lives to only Him. It was not even a month later that we conceived Lucas, our son who will be turning 15 in June! We immediately knew the glory went to our Jesus. He hasn't changed. He still waits for us to surrender ALL... To stop the battle. I don't know why it has taken us so long this time to lay this all at His feet, but we finally have. With that, there is much more beauty in the every day again. This place that we have made home even appears more beautiful than before. He has given me new eyes with this act of surrender. He has heard my prayers about wanting to get back to living only for each day instead of rushing time away. The white flag is up and waving strong. With His help, we will continue to hold it high.