The Process

I was inspired to write this morning... by my deck plants.

I have a hydrangea bush in a large container on my deck in front of a big floor to ceiling window. I also have a small lavender plant in a tin pot not too far from the hydrangea. You can see both plants from this large window.

This morning I was folding laundry on my couch and I was praising God for another gorgeous day of sunshine. It's finally here... the sun and the warmth. As I was gazing out the window, I saw these two plants and I immediately started wondering WHEN they would finally bloom! They have both had buds on them for awhile now, and in the past, they have already been in bloom by this time of year. I looked out the window again and tried to imagine them with their beautiful purple and blue flowers and the fragrance that enters my screen door. Then, I was hit hard with this thought...

When they bloom, the bees come. They torment us as we pass by going to and from our front door. Another thing... when they bloom, it will be beautiful, but then their blooms dry up and I have to wait another year for them to come back again. Do you see where I'm going with this?

Sometimes I find myself rushing the process. I get so excited about what's to come, that I fail to truly enjoy where I am already at. In every stage of life, there is beauty and then there are things that torment me, or make me long for more of what used to be... all at the same time. Even still, I catch myself wanting to move on to the next stage. Not because I dis-like where I'm at, or because I can't find the beauty in where I'm at now.... BUT because I look to the future with excitement and anticipation! What will life be like in 5 years? What will the boys look like? What will they be doing? Will J and I still love doing the same things we do now? I picture them in my head and I see such miracles. I see boys who love life and how perfect they are RIGHT NOW. I see a husband who puts his family first in everything he does and always makes sure we are more than taken care of. I wouldn't want him to be any different than he is at this very moment.

My hydrangea and lavender plants reminded me this morning not to rush the process. They are perfect just as they are right now. They are a daily reminder of all that is yet to come, but they remain beautiful even today, without their flowers and swarming bees. One of these mornings I will look out there and see purple or blue and I will smile then too. I will smile because of their pretty flowers, but I'll also smile because I will know that they won't last... but that's okay. It's part of the process.