It doesn't seem possible.
How did this happen?
When did my baby grow up almost overnight?
I commented on a "bloggy friend's" blog the other day that I really do believe that watching our children grow is the most rewarding, fun, but PAINFUL thing that a mother has to endure!
I believe this because I look at my now sixteen year old and I can still smell what he smelled like on that first day. His scent was sweet and intoxicating, not that of a locker room or Axe men's body spray.
I can feel his velvety soft new skin against my cheek. His tiny fingers curled around mine. His face is a man's now... All rough and prickly. My hands get lost in the enormity of his now.
Everywhere we went, I was responsible for getting him safely there and home again. Maybe in a car, or a stroller. Sometimes in a sling or backpack. He was attached to me. Last night, after we finished our meal at Mel's Diner (his birthday choice), we piled into the family mini van and he drove all of us home.
It all happened SO fast!
Lucas has grown into an amazing young man though. One that I could not be more proud of. He is an old soul in many ways. He talks of days gone by, simpler days, and wishes he would have lived in more those times. I remember feeling that way too. Little did I know how much MORE complicated times would become for my children! He dreams of classic cars (trucks) in his someday driveway and he tells us in detail what they look like. I do not doubt that he will own at least one.
This young man loves Jesus. He is not afraid to stand up to any crowd and be exactly who he is. No compromises! Now that his younger brother is starting high school in the fall, we hear Lucas sharing many words of encouragement with Colby about what to expect, and how to be strong in character always. When I hear the words being spoken, I find a lump in my throat. Again, it's just so hard to believe we are at this stage of life already. My oldest sounding so adult-like and full of wisdom. My second born listening with intention and confidence that he can do this too.
Happy birthday, Luke! Yesterday, at the end of the day I asked you if you knew what I was doing at that moment sixteen years ago. You took some guesses. All were wrong. I told you I was staring at you. I know it might sound weird to you now, but I know that someday you will know exactly what I mean... What I felt. I stared at you then because everything was new to me. Your cute little button nose. Those perfect lips, and that beautiful olive skin..... All of it was new. I found myself in dis-belief! The Lord had fulfilled so many promises to me on that day. The truth is, He still does.... Everyday. Everyday as I witness you growing in stature, character, and spirit I am blessed. I am reminded of God's faithfulness and goodness to us.
I still stare at you, you know that? You are precious to me.... I love you SO much!