School has started

It's only August, but according to the school calendar that I get from the charter that we home school through... school has officially started. That big yellow bus stops in front of my house every morning as a reminder. A reminder of many things...

A reminder of the privilege that it is to teach my boys in our home with the freedoms that many don't have.

A reminder that my boys are growing so fast and before I know it, they will be driving themselves all over the place (hopefully NOT up and down Foresthill Rd.).

A reminder that I need to ask others for prayer concerning this school year.

My heart is tired as we start this school year. That has never happened before. I have always started the school year with excitement and anticipation over what is to come. Right now though.... I feel empty. At first I questioned that maybe it was time to send the boys off to school. I spent a great amount of time praying about that though, and I genuinely don't feel released to do that. Once again, this struggle that I'm having is part of a bigger picture. I feel like my life right now is just a puzzle. The pieces are scattered out on the table. As I stare at the pieces, nothing makes sense, BUT... that overwhelming sense of knowing that God sees the finished "portrait" keeps me going. I do find comfort in that.

I'd love any ideas any of you might have concerning getting my school year off right. Have any of you other home schooling friends (and recent "blog friends") struggled with starting the school year off with a stinky attitude? What helped you? I'd LOVE any advice (big or small) you want to share... and, of course... your prayers.

I know God is in this. He challenges me in ways that He knows will get my attention.

My attention is yours, Father. Please show me the light to the path on which I'm to follow... with a heart that is willing and above all else, excited!