I have been withholding information.
A couple of months ago, we were informed of a house in our area that would soon be vacant. It is currently being lived in. Some friends from church have made it their home for a couple of years now. On a Saturday morning awhile back, this friend called me to tell me that they would be moving. I quickly responded with specific prayers that we would be offering during their moving process. About mid-conversation, he asked me, "Wait, aren't you guys looking for another house to rent?" I told him that we were, but that God had put it on our hearts to stay put and get comfortable. I told him about the fact that even as we spoke on the phone in that moment, my boys were busy moving furniture and clothing from room to room as we had decided to make things a little more comfy for all of them. This friend (I'll refer to him as 'G') told me that we should consider renting the house that they had been living in when they moved in July. Hmmm.... Our lease in this house is officially up in July. Was this something we were supposed to look at, even after we thought we had heard it so clearly from the God that we should stay? I told G that I would talk to Hubby and we would pray.
Fast forward about two months.
We are moving in to this home in two weeks. Of course, it wouldn't be ours if not for the story attached, so grab your cup of coffee and read on....
We went to the property management company and filled out all of the necessary paper work after deciding that this home isn't something we went looking for, it came looking for us. Maybe that's just how the Lord wants it. He wanted to see us surrender our future more and put our trust more in Him. The PMC told us that nothing else could be done until we were thirty days out from our friends' move date. At the time, they would contact the owner and run all of our information by him to get final approval of our moving in. The thirty day mark came.... And it went. Our friends put their final notice in, but the owner took many days to get back to the PMC. After finally contacting them, he informed them that he was talking with realtors now about selling instead of continuing to rent it out. WHAT?? For some reason, we have this incredible history of finding these kinds of scenarios in our area! I lost it.
I have held my cool pretty well in the past when coming across these kinds of disappointments, but not this time. I was angry, and I was hurt. I felt like this carrot had been hung right in front of my nose only to taunt me. I had finally come to understand and accept that this home where we are at now would be home for another two years. I had come up with new ideas to make it home. I was okay with it before the carrot was hung. Now I was just confused on what the purpose in this was.
I went to bible study that night (against my wishes, really). I wasn't going to share with the ladies there because quite frankly, I'm tired of sounding like a discontented whiner. I almost felt foolish for even going forward with the idea of moving again when we already have a home. The palms of my hands became clammy (which ALWAYS means that I'm supposed to share) so I shared. It came out in the form of sobbing really, and then I felt even more stupid! These ladies are quite the saints though. They had just the right things to share, even the hard things that I needed to hear. I went home that night feeling blessed.
The next morning I took the kids to school and came home. I cleaned the house and re-arranged again. I saw that I had e-mail, but I put that off. After awhile, I sat on the couch and fell apart again as I spoke aloud to the Lord. I desperately felt that I needed him to show me what this was all about. After a bit, I went to my e-mail. Waiting for me there was this sweet devotional from one of my friends at bible study the night before. The devotion was about surrender and waiting. Wow... His timing is NEVER off, is it? The devotion used an illustration about the eagle. It told of how the eagle has a long life span, but about half way through it's life, it must go through a process where it literally sits in it's nest and plucks it's feathers, yanks it's talons out and then pecks it's own beak off. It does all of this to experience new growth. Once this I would assume, painful process is finished, it is a new bird that goes on to live the other half of it's very long life. Great story! Apparently, I had some plucking to do. I was immediately thankful for a God who heard me and supplied me with exactly what I needed... The purpose.
Two days later I'm at the dog park with my boys and dogs. My Hubby called while I was there to tell me that the owner changed his mind about selling... The house is ours! At first I don't even know what to feel. In some ways, I feel like I am un-deserving because I threw this little fit like a two year old. In some ways I feel like I don't even believe it. Then, in other ways, I feel and KNOW that God had it planned like this from the beginning. The purpose is still there... To show me where my new growth still needed to take place. As I sit in the PMC office a few days later signing all of the paper work, I look down at the address of my soon to be new home. I had never really looked at it before. The name of the street seemed to just stare me in the face. I couldn't believe it, and my eyes started to get wet. Without putting my exact address on the WWW, I can share with you that the name of the street is Eagles Nest. Did you just get the same goose bumps that I got? God is pretty amazing! No, not really. He is AWESOMELY AMAZING! He gave me my own nest to continue my plucking and pecking. If not for the WHOLE story, there would be none of this. I stand in awe... Truly.
Today I sit here among boxes again. A sight that has become all too familiar, but not without purpose.
The story continues....