Sunday, March 29, 2009

On Being Pantyhose...

God has been working in me this week. He has been very busy planting seeds of truth in my heart. Some of these "plantings" have happened under quite unusual circumstances... Ones that I never would have expected. It seems that I'm being stretched once again (or is that STILL?).

A couple of years ago, we had some conflict that took place between our family and another family up here where we live. I won't go into details, because the details aren't important. What IS important is that for two years I haven't been able to handle running into these people at the grocery store (we live in a small town) and THIS week I was praying for the father of this family, as well as asking others to pray for him. He had some unexpected medical problems that gave his family quite a scare. I prayed earnestly for this man. I asked God for healing, peace and comfort. I asked Him for these things in the same way that I would have asked for them for my OWN family. God stretched me.

A couple of weeks ago, I received a phone call that made me sad. It was relational, and again, I won't go into details, but the sadness gave way to anger. The anger took over my heart THIS week, and once again, I was called to pray about it. I asked God to direct the anger to where it needed to be. I prayed that God would show me how to use this anger in a positive way. I prayed that God would give me someone I could talk to about it that would understand at least PART of what I was feeling. A few minutes later... the phone rang. It was a good friend who needed a ride to get her car that had been repaired at the shop. The boys were taken care of, and I was off to have a few minutes alone with a friend. This time had been completely orchestrated by God. After talking, I knew what God was calling me to do. God IS stretching me in this situation.

Lately, I've just felt like a pair of pantyhose.... being stretched to their maximum... You know, like trying to fit into a size A when you're really a size B? Okay, so for you male readers, you won't get that. Sorry. I fight the size difference. I want to remain comfortable right where I've always been. I don't WANT to be asked to do new things... go new places where I've never been before. Does God want that for me though? Of course not. He sees me as his infant.. entering into toddler-hood. As his teen... entering into woman-hood. It's ALWAYS about growing. I should never be content in my spirituality. There is continuously more to be had. There are always new ways in which to be stretched.

I'm not going to say that I love this feeling. I'm not going to say that I'm not often confused by it. I WILL say that I love my Jesus though. I trust Him. I DO love what He is doing with and in my life. I get glimpses sometimes of the person that He desires me to be and how He will ultimately take me there. That, friends, DOES feel good.

1 comment:

The Estrogen Factory said...

Hey you.... My mom used to say that the hardest part of life by FAR was learning to deal with relationships. I totally believe her. I'm sorry you've had struggles lately. That's very stressful. I know, too, that the Lord helps us through everything. I love you and will keep you in my prayers!